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Avg Joe
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Posted: Thu Jul 29, 2010 9:39 pm |
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Joined: Tue Jul 14, 2009 10:09 am Posts: 475 Been Liked: 0 time
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Hopefully she was just having a bad day and needed to vent a little at your expense. But if it came out, there's definitely merit behind it. I can't give you answer on what to do here. I don't believe in the "what if" questions that I haven't experienced. I think if you haven't experienced the situation, then you answer with your head. But we all know the heart is a powerful, powerful thing. I do agree with the "until she is paying 50%" point. Maybe take it a step further and add your KJ $$ into the mix. You get paid for doing something you love, isn't that what people are after? Don't agree with the counsler thing. I suggested one for us with the wife years ago when we were having issues. Wife says "you'll listen to some stranger but not me?". Never brought it up again. Saw it as wasted money. Can't think of anything I hate more than an ultimatum though. I make sure They lose on it.
Second question: It's been a plus for us. We both work fulltime jobs. She does most of the kid stuff because her hours are more set than mine and she's close to home. We like the smaller venue pub type places that has it all. She doesn't sing but maybe 4 times a year. States she likes to listen to me. Which works for me because I enjoy doing it. She's a quieter type person normally (before a couple drinks gets her a little social ) So for us to go out meet people is fun. She gets to rely on my more out going personality for fun. We've made alot of friends. And friends we'll actually go out with and do other things with.
The affect has definitely been positive for us.
Yep, feel for ya Topher
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Flipper
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Posted: Fri Jul 30, 2010 1:33 pm |
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Joined: Wed Mar 17, 2004 6:46 pm Posts: 1264 Been Liked: 0 time
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I had a girlfriend do something similar about 8 years ago. I was earning 50% my income from karaoke at the time.
I just asked her what is she willing to give up in return. After all the income will be considerably less so let's forget the trips to the beach, dining out, and those surprise gifts, flowers and romantic getaways we have come to enjoy.
The moment she realized she was going to have to give up those things her whole attitude changed.
If she would have not backed off I would have ended the relationship. Karaoke and my business interests were started way before we met so it's not like it was something new for me. When she decided to enter into a relationship with me she knew how much it meant to me.
Fast forward 6 months later....she could not handle it and began trying to sabotage my business by causing problems with my venues and regular customers. I had to end the relationship.
Good luck in making your decision. If it were me I would continue to do what I have always done. If she really loves you she will adapt and cope with her insecurities and if not then she will move on.
I feel for ya man!! Hang in there!
_________________ FlipSide Karaoke
Scott
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pennylane1284
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Posted: Sun Aug 08, 2010 8:15 pm |
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Joined: Sun Aug 08, 2010 7:23 pm Posts: 5 Been Liked: 0 time
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1. I think it's unfair of her to ask you to give up something you love. Tell her that and ask her what she'd do in your position.
2. Well, I'm not in a relationship right now, so that should tell you something. Anyway, karaoke did not cause my last break-up, and I don't see why it should cause anyone else's.
Jian edit: do it again and you will be banned.
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Moonrider
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Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 3:58 am |
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Joined: Sun Jul 05, 2009 6:13 pm Posts: 551 Been Liked: 0 time
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_________________ Dave's not here.
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jerry12x
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Posted: Mon Aug 09, 2010 3:37 pm |
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Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 11:40 am Posts: 2289 Location: Bolton UK Been Liked: 3 times
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Guys. Stop putting women down.
It happens to some of you as well.
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classickaraoke
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Posted: Mon Aug 23, 2010 9:30 am |
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Joined: Thu Apr 10, 2008 2:12 pm Posts: 299 Been Liked: 0 time
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Update...
Wife filed for divorce... one of the things mentioned was Karaoke, does that count?(Can't really say anymore as ongoing legal matter!)
- Jonn
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BruceFan4Life
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Posted: Mon Aug 23, 2010 9:52 am |
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Joined: Wed May 18, 2005 10:03 pm Posts: 2674 Location: Jersey Been Liked: 160 times
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classickaraoke @ August 23rd 2010, 12:30 pm wrote: Update...
Wife filed for divorce... one of the things mentioned was Karaoke, does that count?(Can't really say anymore as ongoing legal matter!)
- Jonn
Maybe you were singing too many "duets"? Sorry for your loss, Jonn.
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letitrip
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Posted: Mon Aug 23, 2010 10:20 am |
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Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2009 8:53 am Posts: 1462 Location: West Bend, WI Been Liked: 3 times
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classickaraoke @ Mon Aug 23, 2010 11:30 am wrote: Update...
Wife filed for divorce... one of the things mentioned was Karaoke, does that count?(Can't really say anymore as ongoing legal matter!)
- Jonn
Dude, that's horrible news!! I'm very sorry to hear this. I have a lot of opinions based on what I know about your situation from what you shared, but I'll be nice to your wife and bite my tongue
_________________ DJ Tony
Let It Rip Karaoke
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ripman8
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Posted: Mon Aug 23, 2010 12:25 pm |
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Joined: Sat Nov 15, 2008 6:34 pm Posts: 3616 Location: Toronto Canada Been Liked: 146 times
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Sorry Jonn. Something that isn't pleasant at all. All I can see is there will be a day when it's water under the bridge and all the hurt is gone.
_________________ KingBing Entertainment C'mon Up! I have a song for you!!! [font=MS Sans Serif][/font]
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diafel
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Posted: Mon Aug 23, 2010 10:51 pm |
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Joined: Sun Dec 16, 2007 8:27 am Posts: 2444 Been Liked: 46 times
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I have to chime in as well. Sorry, Jonn. It's a rough road. My best wishes are with you.
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Bazza
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Posted: Tue Aug 24, 2010 6:29 am |
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Joined: Mon Nov 24, 2008 8:00 am Posts: 3312 Images: 0 Been Liked: 610 times
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classickaraoke @ Mon Aug 23, 2010 12:30 pm wrote: Update...
Wife filed for divorce... one of the things mentioned was Karaoke, does that count?(Can't really say anymore as ongoing legal matter!)
- Jonn
While it may not seem like it at the moment, this is for the best. If it hadn't been karaoke it would have been something else. In a few short months you will look back and say "what was I thinking!".
In the words of Shinedown: "Sometimes goodbye is a second chance".
Hang in there!
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classickaraoke
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Posted: Tue Aug 24, 2010 3:02 pm |
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Joined: Thu Apr 10, 2008 2:12 pm Posts: 299 Been Liked: 0 time
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Thanks all for your best wishes. Even though we've never met it does feel like you're not strangers.
Jonn
P.S. Karaoke wasn't the prime reason at all but it was mentioned way down the list!
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admaero
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Posted: Tue Aug 24, 2010 4:35 pm |
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Joined: Fri Aug 13, 2010 6:50 am Posts: 96 Location: Tucson, AZ Been Liked: 0 time
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My suggestion would have been to take her along with you to karaoke, put some haloperidol or something in her drink, get her really stoned, and just let her veg out in the corner while you do your show. Naturally you would have to make sure that no one else picked her up and dragged her away, but aside from that, she would always have a good time, as far as she knew.
Why am I making light of such a horrible situation? It's a mechanism that I developed for dealing with stuff like divorce, morphine addiction, kidnapping and torture, being tossed into a mental hospital, and all of the other crap that has happened to me over the years. If your life is going to suck, it is best to stay on the depressive side, stay intoxicated as much as possible, cry at weddings, laugh at funerals.
Now next time you go to karaoke, since she's divorcing you anyway, you can tell jokes about "the (@$%!)", and you'll be surprised at how many snickers and understanding nods you get.
-denise
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Lonman
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Posted: Wed Aug 25, 2010 1:22 am |
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Joined: Mon Dec 10, 2001 3:57 pm Posts: 22978 Songs: 35 Images: 3 Location: Tacoma, WA Been Liked: 2126 times
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Me & my wife met through karaoke. She was a host working for a company I started with so she already knew the ins & outs of what a host needs to go through as far as a certain amount of flirtation. If she ever told me to stop, i'd have kicked her to the curb along time ago. I know who I go home to & so does she.
_________________ LIKE Lonman on Facebook - Lonman Productions Karaoke & my main site via my profile!
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letitrip
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Posted: Wed Aug 25, 2010 8:36 am |
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Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2009 8:53 am Posts: 1462 Location: West Bend, WI Been Liked: 3 times
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Lonman @ Wed Aug 25, 2010 3:22 am wrote: I know who I go home to & so does she.
Such a very important attitude, critical for this job and many other live performance jobs. If a couple hasn't developed that kind of trust, I don't see how they could survive any job that puts one or both of them in any form of publicly visible position.
_________________ DJ Tony
Let It Rip Karaoke
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admaero
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Posted: Wed Aug 25, 2010 1:38 pm |
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Joined: Fri Aug 13, 2010 6:50 am Posts: 96 Location: Tucson, AZ Been Liked: 0 time
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I don't see how any relationship could survive, without trust, under any circumstances. I watch couples get jealous because one of them is talking to someone of the opposite sex, and I have to wonder...what are they afraid of? No way could I be married to someone I didn't trust. That would just make life miserable.
The husband and I used to do karaoke at a lesbian/singles bar. Sometimes I would flirt with girls, a little, and there was a group of young girls there one night who would jump all over him, sit in his lap, and rub his head every time he did a song. He looked kind of annoyed, but I thought it was funny. I have kissed girls (and even a guy or two) at Rocky Horror, and he knows that it's all clowning.
If you don't have someone you can trust, you don't have someone. If you're doing nothing wrong and someone doesn't trust you, that's their problem. Anything else, you can work with, but the trust is the most important thing.
Oh...and it helps if he has a job.
-denise
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jerry12x
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Posted: Wed Aug 25, 2010 3:56 pm |
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Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 11:40 am Posts: 2289 Location: Bolton UK Been Liked: 3 times
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admaero @ Wed Aug 25, 2010 9:38 pm wrote: but the trust is the most important thing.
-denise
Yes
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Avg Joe
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Posted: Thu Aug 26, 2010 6:41 pm |
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Joined: Tue Jul 14, 2009 10:09 am Posts: 475 Been Liked: 0 time
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letitrip @ Wed Aug 25, 2010 10:36 am wrote: Lonman @ Wed Aug 25, 2010 3:22 am wrote: I know who I go home to & so does she. Such a very important attitude, critical for this job and many other live performance jobs. If a couple hasn't developed that kind of trust, I don't see how they could survive any job that puts one or both of them in any form of publicly visible position.
Both right! Important attitude in general.
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Lonman
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Posted: Fri Aug 27, 2010 1:34 am |
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Joined: Mon Dec 10, 2001 3:57 pm Posts: 22978 Songs: 35 Images: 3 Location: Tacoma, WA Been Liked: 2126 times
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letitrip @ Wed Aug 25, 2010 9:36 am wrote: Lonman @ Wed Aug 25, 2010 3:22 am wrote: I know who I go home to & so does she. Such a very important attitude, critical for this job and many other live performance jobs. If a couple hasn't developed that kind of trust, I don't see how they could survive any job that puts one or both of them in any form of publicly visible position.
She was the singer in my band, I watched all kinds of possible scenerios as she did with me, again, we both drove home together at the end. I was flashed more times than not while she was on stage singing, but then again, I watched the same to her. Trust has to be a huge factor in this business - regardless of karaoke, dj, live music, whatever.
_________________ LIKE Lonman on Facebook - Lonman Productions Karaoke & my main site via my profile!
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jerry12x
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Posted: Fri Aug 27, 2010 6:20 pm |
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Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 11:40 am Posts: 2289 Location: Bolton UK Been Liked: 3 times
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admaero @ Wed Aug 25, 2010 12:35 am wrote: My suggestion would have been to take her along with you to karaoke, put some haloperidol or something in her drink, get her really stoned, and just let her veg out in the corner while you do your show. Naturally you would have to make sure that no one else picked her up and dragged her away, but aside from that, she would always have a good time, as far as she knew.
Why am I making light of such a horrible situation? It's a mechanism that I developed for dealing with stuff like divorce, morphine addiction, kidnapping and torture, being tossed into a mental hospital, and all of the other crap that has happened to me over the years. If your life is going to suck, it is best to stay on the depressive side, stay intoxicated as much as possible, cry at weddings, laugh at funerals.
Now next time you go to karaoke, since she's divorcing you anyway, you can tell jokes about "the <span style=font-size:10px><i>(@$%&#!)</i></span>", and you'll be surprised at how many snickers and understanding nods you get.
-denise
Denise. Only one airplane. A bunch of cars.
A couple of businesses.
What a looser.
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