Quote: I heard from a good source tonight, which was a best friend of his dads, that the real reason behind his apparent depression was with the fact his ex wouldn't let him see his kids.
and of course for all we know, there might be a legit reason behind that too.
Quote: I also heard that his current gf was spending some time in the bin to help deal with the pain.
I can say with some confidence that assuming I was codependant on a person who's suicide I witnessed I too would need to be hospitalized for awhile. I'd need 24 hour attention just to talk.. Naturally I don't know this girl, but assuming she's a decent person, and something episodic about their relationship just added to a domino affect, or what seemed to be a downward spiral for him, she must be feeling responsible, and horribly guilty.. I know survivors of suicides who are quiite ill and self-loathing.. It's horrible what this type thing does to close survivors.. I was engaged to a girl who witnessed her mothers suicide when she was 13 years old. Unfortuneately she never got help for it (1960's when this happened and a family that swept everything under the carpet)- she didn't cope well, and threatened suicide on the phone many times herself while drunk and drugged.. These types situations are VERY tough. REgardless how many times she threatened suicide just the threat kept me on the phone, and got her the attention she wanted.. Needless to say, I eventually woke up and bailed out as soon as she met somebody else..(This was the only engagement of three -all failed attempts- where I was greatful the female met another person  ) It was treacherous.. Despite what shirnks and all councelors said, I wasn't able to turn my back, because I didn't feel I'd be able to forgive myself assuming she wasn't just calling for attention and was sincere (considering suicide was in her family history).. Been involved with females who I found out were manic depressive too- these are TOUGH TOUGH situations..
So, when folks ask "Kappy, why aren't you in a relationship"? the answer is, I want to be happy for a change LOL (additionally, the really balanced females want nothing to do with me )
I suppose I'm greatful that my own struggles have just been fighting to survive, and hoping to find happiness, and the fact my own family is relatively stable is a good thing too.. Those that battle serious depression in any form have it tough, and unless I was suffering tremendous guilt over something horrible I did ( I think of these episodes where a parent accidently backs a car over their child playing in the driveway- or something similar where I'd likely never be able to forgive myself or live with my conscience), I personally can't imagine not wanting to "be happy" and be willing to fight for that too.. Happiness isn't an easy thing to attain, it's a worthwhile goal IMHO.
JMO- Yet those with certain illnesses are at a tremendous disadvantage, but of course shouldn't be drinking either. There genuinely are certain people that SHOULD NOT be drinking. Yet as adults we must know our own boundaries, and assume responsibility of us.
|
