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The Rumor Mill
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Author:  michaeljvaughn [ Mon Jan 26, 2009 3:13 pm ]
Post subject:  The Rumor Mill
Okay, the disintegration of my thread on April Fool's has inspired me to ask a more serious question. How do YOU handle gossip at your karaoke bar?

My KJ-pal E has always done remarkably well at staying out of the fray, but she did break her policy recently to inform me of the nasty things supposed friends were saying about me. I actually much appreciate the info, and will be on my guard around those particular people. I most certainly will not acknowledge knowing about what they said - or where I got the low-down - but it did take the blinders from my eyes when it came to a few folks.

So I guess the question there is, do you ever break the neutrality principle when it comes to a close friend?
Author:  knightshow [ Mon Jan 26, 2009 3:31 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Rumor Mill
bar environments, people are going to talk.

Unless I knew them outside the bar, their opinion mattered little to me.

For example, one gal came up to me at my gig and said, "Oh I hear you're gay!"

I just laughed and said, "Bend over and let's find out!"

It's all in how you take it. Some rather hurtful things can and WILL be said. But as I imbibed VERY little at my gigs, if at all, and I always tried to treat everybody fairly, most of the things said there were probably true.

Now my first hangout when I was enjoying karaoke only as a singer? Yeah, there were some pretty hurt feelers there. I learned who to trust VERY quickly.
Author:  Nlouch [ Mon Jan 26, 2009 3:52 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Rumor Mill
The gossip at my local is that I've slept with half the women there.

1) If it were true, I'd be broken in half by their guys.

2) They wish.

My reaction: Don't get involved with gossip.
Author:  Lonman [ Mon Jan 26, 2009 3:54 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Rumor Mill
I don't get involved. If it's a friend of mine, typically they are old enough to deal with it. I don't play the he said she said game. I do my job. If someone insists on telling me anything, I dismiss it and continue.
Author:  JerryJames [ Mon Jan 26, 2009 3:54 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Rumor Mill
Sometimes people will say thing that they don't mean or maybe don't mean to say out loud. Sometimes they will even change thier mind later about what they think about a person. And as a KJ or friend would I want to make someone feel bad about themselves or another. I'm like knightshow, at some level you can't worry about what people think. If you let other people decide who you are, well.... you will never be yourself.
Author:  Boatman [ Mon Jan 26, 2009 4:19 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Rumor Mill
Bars are no different than any other place else in that regard. I work with a large group of men, but some here I classify as women in mens bodys, (Sorry no disrespect to any women, and actually I think men are worse gossipers).
I find that most of the time I find that when someone says something negative about me, it's usually the ones that are jealous for one reason or another, and don't have much going for them in their own life. So instead of anger, I might just pity that person instead.
If someone that I had a lot of respect for said something negative behind my back, it would bother me, but that's not usually the case.
Hold your head up, and take them with a grain of salt. Actually, I think Morgan had a scrolling banner across the bottom of her posts that makes a lot of sense.
Hopefully you don't have my temper,lol...Ron
Author:  fromadistance [ Mon Jan 26, 2009 4:50 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Rumor Mill
Maybe this will help

Image
Author:  mckyj57 [ Mon Jan 26, 2009 6:26 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Rumor Mill
It goes right over my head. My wife calls me "Mr. Oblivious" (after the Bob & Tom character, if anyone knows Mr. Obvious).

Most people who know me don't even bother telling me rumors -- they know I am not interested. When I am hosting, I am generally too busy for that type of talk anyway. Afterward and before, I am busy setting up or breaking down. During the show, I am busy mixing or entering singers/songs.
Author:  jamkaraoke [ Mon Jan 26, 2009 7:09 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Rumor Mill
As a KJ I like to maintain a profesional relationship

I'm FRIENDLY but don't want to be FRIENDS so to speak. I have a KJ friend who seems to befriend many of the singers and eventually those "friends" are the ones that end up doing her out of a gig
Author:  disorientedproductions [ Mon Jan 26, 2009 9:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Rumor Mill
I have definitely made it a policy to stay out of bar drama as much as possible. In regards to someone being slanderous to a close friend it is a tough decision to not say anything. However, I usually will warn a friend without going into specifics that they should be on guard as to who they confide in the bar environment, without pointing out any specific person. They simply have to handle the situation themselves.
Author:  JoeChartreuse [ Mon Jan 26, 2009 10:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Rumor Mill
I call the people I only know from bars "Night Lite", and their words don't much matter, whoever they talk about. It's bored, no life people who usually get involved in the slop.

I'm a player, I'm not a player, I'm gay. I'm straight, I'm married, I'm single,.... I hear it all and just keep working.

Since bar rumors are by nature unreliable, I see no reason to repeat them, no matter what the content...
Author:  michaeljvaughn [ Wed Jan 28, 2009 12:01 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: The Rumor Mill
The first warning sign in my last relationship was that the woman seemed to be taking a poll of the bar to check me out. It's amazing how much action I was rumored to be getting! I suppose one of my "problems" is that I have a lot of female friends - and of course the barflies will assume that you're sleeping with every single one of them.
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