Karaoke Forums

Now that I am back to gigging, I've been reminded about the "jerks" we have to deal with. And I could really use as much feedback as I can get on how to react to them.

Examples:

You better not play any hip-hop; my friend can't stand it!

You need to turn the music down!

Do you have any (.......fill in the blank)?

Can you pick a song for me?

Can you put me in to sing_ _ _? (Meanwhile, it's not that person's turn and they don't want to fill out a slip)

The person requests that you lower the key. Then they stop singing shortly after the song begins because they realize that the song is too low for them to sing in the original key, much more so in the lowered key!

Please note that I am most concerned with the generalities of dealing with such problems rather than suggestions regarding each specific circumstance. But I'll take specific advice as well!

Eric, I really can't generalize since all people and situations are different, other than to say I would be as helpful and friendly as possible. Therefore, specifically, and in order:


1) I would politely explain to the patron that I don't choose the songs, the singers do, and what they choose, they sing. Period.


2) IF I'm sure that I'm at the right level, I tell this patron that 2 people just asked me to turn it UP, but out of respect to him, I'll just leave it be....

3) If I know, I'll give a direct answer. If I'm not up to my a**, I'll look in my master, otherwise I explain that I have 25,000 songs, am carrying around 15,000, and can't possibly remember them all. Then I point to the books scattered around the room.

4) This question usually comes from a newbie. I will try and ask questions. Favorite songs, artists, radio station, or anything else that might help me get a handle. Then I might give suggestions, and maybe get lucky. I try to do the best I can to help Newbies. Future regulars, ya know.....


5) I get this more than anything else. To drunk to see, or too lazy to look. Doesn't matter. I probably shouldn't, but I say yes, and stick a slip up for them. In some cases, super regulars do it, and it's no problem. They sing the same songs so often I have them memorized.


6) No biggie. I usually recognize the problem before they do. Since it's right in the beginning, a do-over is ok. If they DON'T notice and stop, I will do my super secret thingy and just keychange the mic.

Hope that's what you were looking for....

_________________
"No Contests, No Divas, Just A Good Time!"

" Disc based and loving it..."

what is this magical "keychange the mic" thing you speak of Joe?

1. For the complaint about the hip hop, you're not playing it, they're singing it!

2. You need to move away from the speakers! Nobody else is complaining!

3. huh? Customer questions DO go with the j.o.b.!

4. "Alley Oop?" Trust me, you don't WANT me to pick a song for you, and as busy as I am, I can't. Just fill out the slip.

5. Just hand them a slip, Eric! The more you sit there and debate with them, the more convoluted it's going to be!

6. Yeah, I agree... just restart it. But ONLY do it once. The next time they request the key lower or higher, tell them it's NOT going to get changed after it gets started. The biggest problem with the key change for customers is, many times, they DON'T know what they're talking about!

hmmm Joe what about if I wanted to sing a song sitting in you lap? do-able?

_________________
"Be who you are and say what you feel... Because those that matter... Don't mind...And those that mind... Don't matter."

I tell them that this is the most popular karaoke room in the area because we allow everything and direct them to the quieter country karaoke bar a few minutes away.


I tell them that this is the most popular karaoke room in the area because of the volume and energy and direct them to the quieter country karaoke bar a few minutes away.


I'll either give them a book turned to that artist's selection or look it up on my computer. The master list is always running in the background.



I say sure, ask them their name, fill out a slip, slap it on the board, and tell them that they're up in 5, 10, whatever. That takes five seconds. Explaining why they should do it instead takes a minute or more. I'm pressed for time up there!


I give them one of these. If they want a second change I ask that they step aside for the next singer so we can figure out what to do.

that would certainly get a rise outta me.....

The examples of problems I presented are not, unto themselves, the actual problem. And as I suggested in my OP, general recommendations about how to handle a "jerk" would be appreciated as well as any specific responses suggested.

It's the attitude of the jerk that is posing the "problem". And that is what I most need help with. Furthermore, my wife accompanies and assists me. Some of these matters could be addressed by her, but the "jerk" ignores my recommendation that they go speak to Robin! On the other hand, I'm not looking to stick Robin with the Jerk either!

And, of course, I am the only one that can deal with the key changes. Unfortunately I wasn't familiar with the song, so it didn't dawn on me that it was too low until the singer complained.

Lastly, if a "jerk" is a jerk because they're drunk, any suggestions for that?


EXAMPLES, ONCE AGAIN:
-You better not play any hip-hop; my friend can't stand it!
-You need to turn the music down!
-Do you have any (.......fill in the blank)?
-Can you pick a song for me?
-Can you put me in to sing_ _ _? (Meanwhile, it's not that person's turn and they don't want to fill out a slip)
-The person requests that you lower the key. Then they stop singing shortly after the song begins because they realize that the song is too low for them to sing in the original key, much more so in the lowered key!

Welll.... if the drunk is a jerk because he's drunk, that's a little more difficult.
They say you can't (and shouldn't) argue with a drunk, and it's true.
As a woman, I have an advantage over guys when dealing with drunks, and I use it.
Unfortunately, Eric, you can't do that.
Drunk men tend to get more aggressive and with guys, that only serves to underscore it.
What I try to do is agree with them as much as possible. Drunks like that.
BUT.... there is a line.
Choose your words carefully when dealing with him. Choose words that will stroke his ego and make him think you really care about him and what his concerns are.
If the guy is just trying to buddy up to you, try to explain to him that you're working and you'll be with him in a second. Then take the time just to pay him a little attention, if that's what he's after.
Explain to him that you don't choose the songs, the singers do. Suggest he sing a song he would rather listen to.
If he is a regular patron, try sitting down with him before the show and give him a book and show him how to use it.
Maybe he can't read and that's why he wants you to look things up. If that's the case (be careful here, you don't want to embarass him!) then suggest to him that your wife will assist him in finding songs.
But explain to him that you are very busy up there, even if it doesn't look like it and you just don't have the time during the show to give him the attention he deserves. (ego stroking there!)
If all else fails, sometimes we just need to tune it out.
If he is there, but hasn't really done anything to get booted out, you may just have to bear that cross, unfortunately.
If that's the case, you may want to speak to the bar staff about keeping him under wraps and away from you.
Hope some of what I've said makes sense and that you can use something from it and it helps you out.

Nothing magic at all, really. I have a separate mixer for vocals that includes all the effects. On occasion ( usually newbies, but always less talented singers) I will use the keychanger on the mic instead of the music to bring a singer in. The reason it's "secret" is that if you tell a singer you're doing it he will automatically start singing lower or higher, messing up the process and sounding even worse.

It's kinda cool because even though they don't know why, they know they sound better at THIS show- good word of mouth. It also helps keep the crowd and staff from sitting through an ear-bleed.

It's not something I do often, only if it's too late in the song, and changing music key will throw off the singer even more.

_________________
"No Contests, No Divas, Just A Good Time!"

" Disc based and loving it..."

Eminently and absolutely do-able, lovely Enchantress. As if you have to ask.

I'm making a "reserved" sign as we text....

_________________
"No Contests, No Divas, Just A Good Time!"

" Disc based and loving it..."

Ah, much more clear. First, A jerk is a jerk because he's a jerk. Getting drunk just lets him act on it. Chemically, alcohol works in the body almost precisely the same as truth serum. The result is the same as well. It lowers or removes inhibition.

If you catch your significant other with someone else, and they say it was because they were drunk, don't believe it. They just lost enough inhibition to do what they WANTED to do.

What I'm trying to say here is that who you see drunk is who they REALLY are, not the other way around. It's important to understand this when dealing with people in bars.

In regard to the jerk: He might start crap, saying something like don't play this or that. The thing is, he's just looking to start crap- and has picked this way to do it. What you play won't make any difference. So- three ways to handle him:


1) Humor. For instance, if he's insulting, smile, agree, and say something worse about yourself. Kinda tough to insult someone who doesn't get insulted. Joke around, start a conversation, ask questions- make a friend. But don't kiss up- it's a sign of weakness. DON'T give in to DEMANDS regarding your show- ever. He'll just keep coming up with more.


2) Intimidate. Whatever your non-verbal style of doing this is. The stony stare, the ready to fight stance, whatever. Look him in the eye and let him know you don't take S***.


3) If 1 & 2 don't work, and you suspect it may escalate, first warn the owner or manager of the possibility, and why. Not only will this cover your butt, they may well eject him before there is more trouble for you.


Usually, one of the above does it. However, the trick is to get a read on the person and pick your style. ALWAYS show full confidence in yourself. However, you must be prepared for anything- it's a bar.

_________________
"No Contests, No Divas, Just A Good Time!"

" Disc based and loving it..."

Couldn't disagree more. I know many, many people who were terrible when they were drunk and never have exhibited that behavior once they stopped drinking completely.

_________________
[color=#ffff55]Mickey J.[/color]
Alas for those who never sing, but die with all their music in them.
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

I'm with mckyj on this one as well. It does NOT act as a truth serum.
While it does tend to lower inhibitions, there are cases where people do things that they really DON'T want to do, regardless of what you may think.
Alcohol acts differently on different people. Some turn into jerks who otherwise are the nicest people you will ever meet. Some turn mushy and cry all night, but certainly not because they are unhappy.
Some will just get happier, even if their life is in turmoil.
And, some are just jerks no matter what, drunk or not.

simply....tell the.......Jerk Off......
over the microphone if necessary.....if that don't work...
jerk the Jerk around....go bizerk on da Jerk.....hope this helps.....made me feel better....

[quote="ericlater @ Sun Feb 01, 2009 11:20 pm"]Now that I am back to gigging, I've been reminded about the "jerks" we have to deal with. And I could really use as much feedback as I can get on how to react to them.

Examples:

You better not play any hip-hop; my friend can't stand it!

I had a guy(I was told he was a musician) in a Tuxedo tell me that once, and then he said "let me introduce you to my little friend", and abruptly pulled a rabbit out from under his jacket....guess he was a magician, and my hearing is really going fast.....

a size ten up his &^%??!! My solution!

handling "problem" customer:

...With a very positive altitude and a big SMILE.

_________________
I can neither confirm nor deny ever having or knowing anything about nothing.... mrscott

what if he likes it?.....

handling "problem" customer:

...With a very positive altitude and a big SMILE.

_________________
I can neither confirm nor deny ever having or knowing anything about nothing.... mrscott