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 Post subject: Negativity
PostPosted: Mon Nov 23, 2009 8:16 am 
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I have been participating in online communities since 1992. And in a couple of those, I have been the "big dog", the leader of the community. As such, I usually was defended by others, but of course like most people online I fall victim to saying things I might not say in person.

While I tend to post some unpopular stuff, you won't usually see me get involved in protracted flame wars. This is part because I am generally aghast that people seem to take stuff said here personally, but also because I know that negativity breeds on itself.

This is why I detest most of the piracy threads, because they seem to be major attractors of the "he-said, she-said" type of flameware I despise.

Here is an interesting article that is food for thought:

http://www.marco.org/81566726

As they say in the talk radio game, "I will hang up and listen".

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Alas for those who never sing, but die with all their music in them.
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 Post subject: Re: Negativity
PostPosted: Mon Nov 23, 2009 9:19 am 
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In Feb I will be 70 years old. In the last 3 weeks I have lifted myself up from chronic depression to the most positive and motivated I have been in a long time.One major hurdle was letting go and flushing all the negatives in my pshchic whether real or imaginary. One step was going offline and not participating in the highly negative flaming and crap on this forum. Most here now has nothing whatsoever to do with promoting, adapting to or realizing success in any phase of our profession.

My participation here will only be occasional positive comments with the attitude of giving opinions of an elder and many years of experience. These comments are not meant to engage in controversy or arguing. They will be meant to add to or present another side of the equation.

I will be moving into another apt and look forward to setting up a new domicile again. For the holidays all here should be thankful for what they have and think of positive ways to get this forum back for the the KJ"S DJ"S and the singers and regulars that come in on a regular basis. I also wish a few more bar owners would join and explain to those here that do not understand the bar business what it is really like.

With that I wish everybody here a good Thanksgiving and holidays to come. Lets bring in the new year with different attitudes.

Ollie Cabaret Karaoke

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 Post subject: Re: Negativity
PostPosted: Mon Nov 23, 2009 9:37 am 
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Quote:
I have been participating in online communities since 1992. And in a couple of those, I have been the "big dog", the leader of the community. As such, I usually was defended by others, but of course like most people online I fall victim to saying things I might not say in person.

While I tend to post some unpopular stuff, you won't usually see me get involved in protracted flame wars. This is part because I am generally aghast that people seem to take stuff said here personally, but also because I know that negativity breeds on itself.

This is why I detest most of the piracy threads, because they seem to be major attractors of the "he-said, she-said" type of flameware I despise.

Here is an interesting article that is food for thought:

http://www.marco.org/81566726

As they say in the talk radio game, "I will hang up and listen".
I couldn't agree more. I'm staying out of these threads for the same exact reason. Besides, nothing is going to get resolved or accomplished by those postings anyway, other than PO'ing each other.


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 Post subject: Re: Negativity
PostPosted: Mon Nov 23, 2009 9:55 am 
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Sevarin @ Mon 23 Nov, 2009 9:37 am wrote:
Besides, nothing is going to get resolved or accomplished by those postings anyway, other than PO'ing each other.



:whistle: ... Exactly. Makes you not even care to log on sometimes, it gets reallllyyy old reading all the same hoopla.

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 Post subject: Re: Negativity
PostPosted: Mon Nov 23, 2009 10:09 am 
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Mickey - Please don't beat yourself up over your comments because you would probably be surprised how many of us on this forum agree with you whole heartedly. I know that I do! I joined this forum to find positive things about running a karaoke show and have been very disappointed by all the negativity that has gone on in here. What is really the irionic part of it all is that most of the negative posts are by the same people ! Hang in there Mickey - some of us here understand just where you stand and have your back!

I hope everyone here has a great and very thankful Thanksgiving. I know that I'm thankful that I have my health, a roof over my head and food in my belly!


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 Post subject: Re: Negativity
PostPosted: Mon Nov 23, 2009 1:15 pm 
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Mickey,

You and I have disagreed on another topic on the forum. I think we both expressed opinions that were rational. I think that people who juxtapose a position by calling their opponent names or saying the other person is somehow morally corrupt or fractured mentally are themselves afraid of reasonable debate.

If you attack the person you lose any credibility on the topic. The only time that might be valid if that person is supporting a completely amoral position like supporting the use of kiddie porn. What I see is that a lot of posts get personal and sometimes spiteful or blended with some past argument or insult. How can someone make any kind of personal judgement based on what is entered thru a keyboard?

In our debate I make no judgements on your character other than by your reaction to my posts seems as if you may be jaded on this topic - which I can understand from your comments here and in the other forums.

I hope I have contributed in a positive way to your subject.

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 Post subject: Re: Negativity
PostPosted: Sat Nov 28, 2009 5:13 pm 
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Mickey, I can be a smart a$$ sometimes, and I hope I haven't offended you on here. Next time you visit Babs's venue, maybe my wife and I can make it too....been a while, and a Saturday is about all we could make.......your participation on this forum is a welcome site for me........take care, my friend


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 Post subject: Re: Negativity
PostPosted: Sat Nov 28, 2009 6:23 pm 
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Life is not all sweetness and light. I never want to bury my head in the sand just because negativity is expressed.

In online communities, in which I've also been a part since the early 90's (remember Usenet and IRC?) I've always gravitated toward a lively, passionate, opinionated discussion. As long as people discuss the issue, it makes for compelling content.

But too often people take a leap from netiquette and make things personal. Flame wars begin when someone asserts it's not that your idea, how you conduct your business, or personal opinion that's stupid, YOU are stupid.

And that's where polite behavior usually opts out.

Ultimately our behavior and interaction is governed by the Dr. Phil-ism, "So how's that working out for you?"

I try not to linger on my failures, but take away whatever learnings I can and approach new opportunities with positive expectations.

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 Post subject: Re: Negativity
PostPosted: Sat Nov 28, 2009 7:07 pm 
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On the contrary I think the piracy issue is one of the more important issues facing karaoke as a KJ.

There is also a lot of false information circulating out there on the issue.

It is also somewhat difficult to figure out what is exactly legal sometimes, and many people are poorly informed.


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 Post subject: Re: Negativity
PostPosted: Sat Nov 28, 2009 9:24 pm 
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johnny reverb @ Sat Nov 28, 2009 8:13 pm wrote:
Mickey, I can be a smart a$$ sometimes, and I hope I haven't offended you on here. Next time you visit Babs's venue, maybe my wife and I can make it too....been a while, and a Saturday is about all we could make.......your participation on this forum is a welcome site for me........take care, my friend

Appreciate that Johnny. Believe it or not, I was only 20 miles south (Willowbrook) last night. We were with family and friends, so no opportunity to make it up there. But it won't be long before I'm back!

We just have to make sure it's not early April, or Babs will have circles under her eyes and will jump at loud noises...

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 Post subject: Re: Negativity
PostPosted: Sat Nov 28, 2009 9:26 pm 
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I was supposed to hang up and listen...I guess I did for almost a week. 8-)

*I* don't have any problem with anything that goes on. But what bothers me is that people seem to get so darn incensed about things. Calling names? Attributing motives to others? That's the kind of thing I can't understand.

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Alas for those who never sing, but die with all their music in them.
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 Post subject: Re: Negativity
PostPosted: Mon Nov 30, 2009 12:22 am 
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mckyj57 @ Sat Nov 28, 2009 11:24 pm wrote:
johnny reverb @ Sat Nov 28, 2009 8:13 pm wrote:
Mickey, I can be a smart a$$ sometimes, and I hope I haven't offended you on here. Next time you visit Babs's venue, maybe my wife and I can make it too....been a while, and a Saturday is about all we could make.......your participation on this forum is a welcome site for me........take care, my friend

Appreciate that Johnny. Believe it or not, I was only 20 miles south (Willowbrook) last night. We were with family and friends, so no opportunity to make it up there. But it won't be long before I'm back!

We just have to make sure it's not early April, or Babs will have circles under her eyes and will jump at loud noises...


LMAO

Sounds like a great plan to me, April or not. A few extra cups of coffee and some tooth picks for my eyes should work.

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