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Keith one time we were working on a tractor and I had this bucket full of gas and was cleaning stuff in it A dog lapped up a bunch got a funny look in his eyes and started walking in a big circle The circles got bigger and bigger and then he just fell over..

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Yep, it happens ever time!.....They just seem to run outta gas!

I totally fell for that one - you 2 are like Abbott and Costello.

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OOOOoooowwwwww

I have 3 little bloody holes in my ear lobe.   I think, she thought it was full of milk.

I'm the mommy.  She lets me know when she is hungry.   She licks a little then starts to nibble on my finger.   With those needle teeth.

Vet says she's AOK.  Got wormed and de-fleaed.     8-10 weeks old.

My dog isn't liking her too much yet.    She feels threatened by the new member of the pack.

I already told you....your dog is sane.

Do you think that dog would allow the cat to bite it's ear?....Listen to the dog, they have good judgement.

Sounds like Big Dog Is Pussywhiped allready.
now get her Declawed and spayed.

A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. "Human beings are the only animals that stutter", she says.

A little girl raises her hand. "I had a kitty-cat who stuttered", she
volunteered. The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident.

"Well", she began, "I was in the back yard with my kitty and the rottweiler who lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard! "That must've been scary", said the teacher.

"It sure was", said the little girl. "My kitty went 'Fffff, Fffff,
Fffff'... and before he could say "F*%@!," the rottweiler ate him!"

that was actually mildly amusing

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"Be who you are and say what you feel... Because those that matter... Don't mind...And those that mind... Don't matter."

Give them time - As long as your dog isn't trying to eat kitty, they
will end up being best friends in the end.

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Don't listen to her!...She is insane too!...She has several cats and she has been breathing their dander, and it's polluted her food for years, so she is a demented cat lover  

It will happen to you too, if you don't stop now....Next thing you know, you will be making big life changes for it...You will allow it to control you and even poop in the house then track it all over your kitchen counters and pillows....Cats convince you that you work for them...They withhold their affection if you don't scramble to please them, then they reward you by wiping their tail under your nose and across your mouth and you are suppose to like it.

The only reason your dog isn't trying to eat kitty is because he thinks you would be displeased with him if he did....Cats don't care if you are displeased with anything they do.

Geezz Keith, tell us how you really feel.

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Around here the cat adopted me and the dog opted for my wife.  The cat acts more like a dog than the dog does sometimes.  Heck, she even comes when I call!

Oh, Keith, I hear that dogs taste really good, especially as a shishkabob

Now there's a real man!  :worship:

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a Dog see's a man pouring food into It's bowl and getting Water from a faucet and Say's      "He must Be A God"

A Cat see's a man Pouring Food into It's bowl and getting Water from a faucet and Say's  " I must Be A God"

Thousands of years ago, Cat's were worshiped as gods in Egypt. They've never forgotten this.

Remember this the next time you see a cath bathing itself.

"Cat's aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit." -John S. Nichols

"One cat just leads to another." -Ernest Hemingway

"Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia." -Joseph Wood Krutch

"There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast." --Unknown

"meooOOW!" SPLAT! "wooOOF!" SPLAT! (raining cats & dogs)

Never try to outstubborn a cat....

A cat is, above all things, a dramatist.

Cat Rule #2: When in doubt, cop an attitude.
Cat Rule #3:Climb your way to the top, that's why the drapes are there

If you want the best seat in the house, move the cat.

It's always darkest before you step on the cat.

It's the cat's house. We just pay the mortgage.

((computer))
Bad or missing mouse driver. Spank the Cat? (Y/n)

Cat + unattended keyboard = garbage all over screen.

Cat HAIR all over the keyboard. Don't blame me for spelling errors.

and finally...

HOW TO WASH THE CAT

1. Thoroughly clean the toilet.

2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water, and have both lids lifted.

3. Obtain the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.

4. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids (you may need to stand on the lid so that he cannot escape). CAUTION: Do not get any part of your body too close to the edge, as his paws will be reaching out for any purchase they can find.

5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power wash and rinse" which I have found to be quite effective.

6. Have someone open the door to the outside and ensure that there are no people between the toilet and the outside door.

7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

8. The now clean cat will rocket out of the toilet, and run outside where he will dry himself.

Sincerely,
The DOG

That cat wash procedure works well but only with full grown cats....Kittens tend to flush.

Bigdog needs to wash the kitten as you described before it gets too big to flush

http://www.amazon.com/101-Uses-a-Dead-Cat/dp/0517545160

http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_1534821.html

Click the above link to discover how your cat can power your car!