Quote:
Cledus..... yer redneck's a showin' agin:) 
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Cletus is ALWAYS best spelt with a "T" ma'am !   one MUST give a proud name all the respectin its deserving of, yisiree,   Maw don't just hand this name out to anyone if'n you know what I mean. Fact bein, only one other brother I know of has this same name !!   It's allways quikist to recollect how to say Cletus if yez breaks the name down into the 3 seperated sillybals it containts
C-   as in Ca   (being the first or monosillabic precurs'n)
Let-    as it's spellin says, the "a" is a silent partner doncha know,  it's missin from
          the cleat, so one says  "leet"   (inbetween monosillabic second curs'n)
us-     As yud say it in normal speak, such as "isss",  not to be confused with 
          the we'z form of the personal plural pronounce. (final curs'n, no relation)
          Put it all together, n it sounds jes like this 
         CA-LEET-US
         
          If'n yez practice nuf, you can get mighty gud and saying it too !!! 
Here's an example of what I'm sez'n !
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         The most purdiest name in the world !
           
          CA-LEET-US
          
          Yez just must keep says'n 
          
          CA-LEET-IS
           'n suddenly that name
            wil never sound the same  
            to yez ! 
    
           CA-LEET-US
           CA-LEET-US
           CA-LEET-US
           CA-LEET-US
             'n suddenly yez finds
              it's nicer than pork rinds, its me !
          
        
           CA-LEET-US
           Sez it LOUD n there's music playin !
           Sez it soft n hear Sassy-Mae bray'in !
          
            OK, time to slop the hogs