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Wow, what a way to destroy a other than that "great" St Patties Weekend!  Short story, I had a (mild) friend...which means that I've saw him and his group of friends virtuallly every weekend for over a year, sadly take his own life or assisted in doing so, after my gig on Friday night.  What makes it even worse is that he has sung like 4 songs and helped out on a few other that night, was in good spirts, plus he's not been known to really be a singer.  I can count less than a handful of times he's sung over the time I've known him.  The last thing he said to me, after singing the last song of the night, picture with my wife, was...."Thanks for helping me out with all the songs tonight, you are a great DJ, I can't wait to till tomorrow night...it'll be a good time"  Him and his gf left at closing time and apparently go into an arguement......What a way to wake up in the morning, driving by his house and there is 3 cop cars there with lights on, then went to the car dealership right next door and another cop was there too....I walked in and heard the news...TOTAL SHOCK!  He was but 23 yrs old......
MrD

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[highlight=midnightblue]MrD - KJ/DJ Specialist
Visit MrD on facebook - mrdsentertainment
& on myspace - larrynance[/highlight]

WOW ...tough story, It is ashame when someone so young thinks the answer could ever be to take your own life? ...   At  least he just took HIS life and no one elses

So sorry to hear that - far too young to have thought that was the solution. Not to say this guy did it, but sadly I think a lot of young people who have dabbled in X (ecstasy) and similar drugs for even a short time are heading into a future of some pretty untreatable depression/mental illness issues. If they haven't started antidepressants yet, they probably will have to to have any sort of quality of life. I can't imagine that there is anything so terribly serious at age 23 that suicide is the solution.

Sorry you have to be dealing with this and that you lost a friend - probably will affect your hosting for a while too, especially at that location. Hard to forget that kind of thing. Godspeed to you in getting over this.

K

Wow, so sad, hard to comprehend...

What does "or assisted in doing so" mean? Possibility of foul play?

Well...the original story that comes from the gf doesn't make sense with the evindence.  It is generally believed that it was a struggle between them, that turned into him getting shot, however not with intent or malice.  I'm still waiting to hear more on what really happened....maybe we'll never know?!!?  MrD

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[highlight=midnightblue]MrD - KJ/DJ Specialist
Visit MrD on facebook - mrdsentertainment
& on myspace - larrynance[/highlight]

Sad thing is it is often the teens and younger people that take their lives, but also remember you know very little about him.  Meaning you don't know whether he has a history of mental illness mixed with drug and alcohol use.  You really know nothing about him.   Sad thing I can recall was being in HS when anouncements from the principle came over class PA system, sometimes the kids were 15.


"I'd like to request a moment of silence in memory of _____"

Often the people we LEAST suspected to take their own lives.  It's usually what we don't know, or info that isn't shared that makes such incidents seem so shocking. Unfortuneately for those often close to the individuals too...

Initial shock aside, You likely will never know ALL the facts surrounding this episode unless you are VERY close to either family (GF or his).. Not knowing, hence not being able to comprehend is what often makes these toughest to digest. Perhaps he's been hospitalized in the past for attempts, BP disorder, Drug and Alcohol abuse, etc..  Sad thing is alcohol is almost always involved too (hypnotic/depressant-friggin STRONG drug !!!).

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Northeast United States runner up for the "Singing Hall of Shame".

Kappy,

You are very correct.  I knew of him casually, to put it best.  I heard from a good source tonight, which was a best friend of his dads, that the real reason behind his apparent depression was with the fact his ex wouldn't let him see his kids.  I also heard that his current gf was spending some time in the bin to help deal with the pain.  I know I couldn't deal with something like that.  It's all totally unreal, thanks for all the thoughts....MrD

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[highlight=midnightblue]MrD - KJ/DJ Specialist
Visit MrD on facebook - mrdsentertainment
& on myspace - larrynance[/highlight]

and of course for all we know, there might be a legit reason behind that too.



I can say with some confidence that assuming I was codependant on a person who's suicide I witnessed I too would need to be hospitalized for awhile.  I'd need 24 hour attention just to talk..  Naturally I don't know this girl,  but assuming she's a decent person, and something episodic about their relationship just added to a domino affect, or what seemed to be a downward spiral for him, she must be feeling responsible, and horribly guilty..  I know survivors of suicides who are quiite ill and self-loathing.. It's horrible what this type thing does to close survivors..  I was engaged to a girl who witnessed her mothers suicide when she was 13 years old.  Unfortuneately she never got help for it (1960's when this happened and a family that swept everything under the carpet)- she didn't cope well, and threatened suicide on the phone many times herself while drunk and drugged.. These types situations are VERY tough. REgardless how many times she threatened suicide just the threat kept me on the phone, and got her the attention she wanted.. Needless to say, I eventually woke up and bailed out as soon as she met somebody else..(This was the only engagement of three -all failed attempts- where I was greatful the female met another person )  It was treacherous.. Despite what shirnks and all councelors said, I wasn't able to turn my back, because I didn't feel I'd be able to forgive myself assuming she wasn't just calling for attention and was sincere (considering suicide was in her family history).. Been involved with females who I found out were manic depressive too-  these are TOUGH TOUGH situations..

So,  when folks ask "Kappy, why aren't you in a relationship"?  the answer is, I want to be happy for a change  LOL  (additionally, the really balanced females want nothing to do with me )

I suppose I'm greatful that my own struggles have just been fighting to survive, and hoping to find happiness, and the fact my own family is relatively stable is a good thing too..  Those that battle serious depression in any form have it tough,  and unless I was suffering tremendous guilt over something horrible I did ( I think of these episodes where a parent accidently backs a car over their child playing in the driveway-  or something similar where I'd likely never be able to forgive myself or live with my conscience), I personally can't imagine not wanting to "be happy" and be willing to fight for that too.. Happiness isn't an easy thing to attain, it's a worthwhile goal IMHO.

JMO-  Yet those with certain illnesses are at a tremendous disadvantage, but of course shouldn't be drinking either.  There genuinely are certain people that SHOULD NOT be drinking.  Yet as adults we must know our own boundaries, and assume responsibility of us.

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Northeast United States runner up for the "Singing Hall of Shame".