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I had what I’m going to call a poor childhood. (And that is all I will ever say about it) But it’s my raising that gave me reason to study people and their motivations. I’m curious why people do what they do.

I know some people have a more simple way of dealing with life than I do and sometimes I wonder why I make things so complicated. I’m thinking that everyone has issue, but it seems like some people don’t faced theirs. I just don’t see how someone can be ok with their self, with anger and bitterness as such a force in their life.

Many years ago I started making myself rules to live by. To help me remember lesson I’ve learned. I thought I would share some of them.


Some people learn most of their social skills by the 6th grade and will never be any more than that.

When bad things happen and they will, there are only 2 choices. I will get bitter or I will get better. (Believe it or not, it is a choice)(I coined this one about 8 to 9 years ago. I’ve see several people have now written books about this)

Each and every person has the right to go to hell, if that is what they want out of life. It’s not up to me.

The only person that I can and want to change is me.

If you don’t love me, just say it out loud. If you don’t trust me, well just don’t. But don’t burn bridges and expect me to rebuild them.


I know I’m being judged strange by some about right now. And that’s ok, I am. I would hope that some would have similar rules or some lesson they have learned and maybe I wouldn’t be strange by myself.

Jay I have been around the block and do have deep beliefs.

I will share a story with you. I went into a convience store and they were about ready to call 911 or the cops. Whats wrong I asked? There is a woman out there sitting on the curb crying. I got pissed. Has anybody thought about going out puttting your arm around her and asking her whats wrong?

So I did. She was broke, confused and didnt know what to do. I wont bother with details but I called her brother in the next state and relayed to him the situation. Where is she? Who are you? To make a long story short he sent money and we got her back home. what was her name? I dont remember.

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Ollie

There are a lot of people hurting right now and I can’t stand it. My mom taught me that you have to play the cards your dealt and I believe that to be true. So I do what I can when I can.

Helping that woman as you did most likely change her life for the better. And that is a really good thing that you did. And from what I know about you I believe that you have a genuinely good heart. And it doesn’t surprise me that you would go out of your way to help someone.

You are not strange by yourself..I love the better or bitter rule and the one about hell..In this life you really have to just try to be the best you can be and not worry (so much anyways,I still worry about my childrens lives which makes me over protective sometimes in this crazy world we live in) about other peoples "life"...Your post was very refreshing to read today thanks

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Kelley
Star Sounds Karaoke & Mobile Recording Studio


[shadow=black][scroll]You have to respect your audience. Without them, you're essentially standing alone, singing to yourself....KD Lang[/scroll][/shadow]

Thanks Kelly, I have 3 girls that I worry about way to much but not without cause. And no doubt they have helped shape some of my rules. I surely understand your concern for your children.

jayvan,

I like your life rules and I don't think they are strange. I don't think you're strange either.

I grew up on a farm in Nebraska in the 50s. Life was hard for my Dad but he never let it make him hard. Lots of what I know I learned from him and I carry it with me to this day. Sometimes I feel like a dinosaur because many of my values are out of fashion. But they are my values and I'm stuck with them. If I didn't live by them I couldn't live.

Amoung the things my Dad taught me are:

If a man's word isn't any good, his signature on a piece of paper isn't any better.

Trust and respect people until they show you they don't deserve those things; then act accordingly.

It's hard to frown when you're whistling or singing.

Never try to teach a pig to sing. It can't be done and it annoys the hell out of the pig.

If you're going to put a stick in a hornets nest you had better be ready for the consequences.

Responsibility, patriotism, and honor are not four letter words and shouldn't be treated as such.

Don't spend your whole life preparing for the future; you may not live to see it.

Never kick a man when he's down. Once he gets on his feet again he may whale the tar out of you.

Be careful about burning bridges just in case you might want to walk across one of them again.

Don't turn your back on a bull or an angry woman.

A hand up is more valuable than a hand out.

No one will ever thank you for doing something that is for their own good.

Always do more than is expected of you and expect less than what you've asked for.

My personal favorite is one I learned on my own. Life is too short for diet soda and lite beer. As an addendum to that I would add decaffinated coffee.

Larry

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"Life is too short for diet soda and lite beer"

Larry, we have some of the same rules and we maybe birds of the same feather. Except I grew up in a small town and a lot of the good things that I have learn came from my Mom.

You have several that I use and here's two of mine that are simular to yours

Don't roll the dice, if you can't pay the price.

Each and every person has a soul that God loves and should be respected as such.


This is one that is the root of a good aditude.
Always do more than is expected of you and expect less than what you've asked for.


And I really like this one and should add it to my list.
Don't spend your whole life preparing for the future; you may not live to see it.


Thanks Larry! Your a good person.

I don't really have any rules except to live my life in such a way that the world will be a better place because I was here.

Tom

I Think that would be one of life's biggest rewards. Just to know that you have made the world a better place.

Thanks Tom

Good stuff here. Thanks for starting this thread. Keep up the good work.

There is a very old saying that goes: Don't do the crime if you can't do the time. Very similar to the saying above about rolling dice.

Back when I was still married I created a slightly different version: If you had to do the time, you ought to be able to do the crime.

That may give you a clue as to why I'm not married anymore. After awhile I started to get tired of being accused of, and having to pay the price for, things I hadn't done. I don't believe it had much to do with marriage; just the person I was married to.

I don't know when ideas like taking responsibility for one's actions and accountability began to wane but this old world has surely become a poorer place as the result.

Things really began to go south when even the President of the United States demonstrated that getting away with something was better than taking respoinsibility for it ("I did not have sex with that woman"). Of course he wasn't the first. Dick Nixon kind of led the way with "I am not a crook". Oddly enough both of those guys were lawyers. Kind of makes one wonder.

Here's one I forgot the other day. I'm not sure that it originated with me but if it did I'm proud to claim it: Never underestimate the value of setting a good example.

Larry

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"Life is too short for diet soda and lite beer"

I’ve received some pretty good pm’s too. I was worried that it wouldn’t go over well, but it has.




Her name wasn’t….aw never mind. Being married is so much fun. I think everybody should try it once or….maybe twice.




There's not much of calling for a good man these days. It's almost like if a good man does one thing wrong, everyone will remember that one bad thing over all the good he's done. Let a man that normally does wrong do a good thing and all his bad things are forgotten.




I like this one. That would surely be a life changing rule.

There's not much of calling for a good man these days. It's almost like if a good man does one thing wrong, everyone will remember that one bad thing over all the good he's done. Let a man that normally does wrong do a good thing and all his bad things are forgotten.

,Thats funny how that seems to work many times, but so true...kinda like the the fault/crack in the liberty bell that will live on forever

Even though I grew up dirt poor, I'm thankful for the good teachings and guidance from my mother (the important things in life money can't buy). Being the hard headed rebel that I am, I usually didn't listen or do what I knew was right, , laughing to myself here because, because as I type I think of the song "The only hell my moma ever raised". I should be able to sing that one with true passion


Anyway Jerry...good thread

Hey Ron, I never was a hard headed rebel but did hang out with a few of them when I was growing up. So I'd always get in the same trouble they would. And I like to think that I'm just strong minded. That's not the same thing, is it?

I do like the "fault/crack in the liberty bell" thing. I will be using that, if you don't mind.



Today one of my supervisor's said, " A bad idea is better than no idea." Needless to say, I have very little faith in my leadership here.

Jerry,



Amen to that, brother.

And about trying marriage 2 or 3 times; I'm not sure if I have the energy any more. I probably should have done that in my 30s or 40s. I have a friend who has been married twice and refuses to try marriage again. He says, "So far I've bought houses for two women. That's enough."

Of course I do have an overriding reason for staying single. First, I don't believe on cheating on who I'm with. And I don't want to die a slow painful death from some horrible disease. When my time comes I would prefer to be shot to death by a jealous husband. Hopefully with my boots on (so to speak). I'm not planning on this happening soon. I would just as soon have it happen when I'm in my 80s.

I may never achieve this particular goal. My girlfriend is a widow and it doesn't seem that she's planning on getting married again, to me or anybody else, anytime soon. And it's looking like this might be a long-term thing for us. So I suppose I ought to start revising my plan. Tomorrow.

I was thinking about this thread the other day and thought I would add something my late mother-in-law always used to say. It was her way of saying that there are times when what's important is the big picture rather than the details. She would say, "I man running for his life wouldn't notice." I can't tell you the number of times that simple phrase has helped me focus on what's important.

By the way, I don't blame you for questioning the quality of the leadership around where you work. That phrase was probably thought up by the guy who said "There are no stupid questions . . ."

Of course there are stupid questions. And there are stupid supervisors who wouldn't have to worry about stupid questions if they were better leaders and communicators.

Larry

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"Life is too short for diet soda and lite beer"

There may not be much of a calling for a good man, BUT, there's nothing wrong with being a good man either. At least when you put your head on the pillow at night, even if no one else knows it, YOU DO.

Rosario

yeah! That is what I'm talking about. Knowing that you are giving your very best and being ok with who you are.

At first I didn’t catch it and I was thinking what? JD you’re funny as all get out. I mean funny ha ha not funny…. well uh...the other funny.

The first 4 years of my life all the young men were off fighting in the big war. I was with my grandpa who could take a team of horses that had been abused and in a few weeks have them working together again. When I was 4 years old these rules were branded into my very soul.

One doesnt break horses he trains them and never ever lays a whip on them. A real cowboy does not wear spurs even on a bucking bronc. The livestock or kids were fed before you ate. Hired hands were fed a hot lunch and when working a horse they were fed extra even oats. If you were short on money their feed came first esp in the winter.

Never kick a dog or abuse a woman in any way.

A mans word is good as gold Never steal or lie and if a man accused you of either one you had license to give him a bloody nose. Never go looking for a fight but never back down either. In a fight it was one on one and if a man was down you didnt kick him.

If a man was broke and hungry you gave him work and fed him. I could go on and on but these are a few of the main ones.

He said dont steal horses but once in awhile when he was drinking he would say that his grandpa was the best horse thief ever. In fact one year they had to run the Kentucky derby with cows.

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