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A woman walks into an accountant's office and tells
him that she needs to file her taxes.

The accountant says, "Before we
begin, I'll need to ask you a few questions."
He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks
"What's your occupation?"
"I'm a Lady of the night," she says.
The accountant is somewhat taken aback and says, "
Let's try to rephrase that."

The woman says, "OK, I'm a high-end call girl".
"No, that still won't work. Try again."

They both think for a minute; then the woman says,
"I'm an elite chicken farmer."
The accountant asks, "What does chicken
farming have to do with being a prostitute?"
"Well, I raised a thousand little peckers last year."

"Chicken Farmer it is."

I'm not sure if that kinda joke is allowed here but I'll let ya slide this time

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MUSIC+DANCE=LIFE

I 'd

Yesterday I had a flat tire on the interstate. So I eased my car over to
the shoulder of the road, carefully got out of the car and opened the
trunk.

I took out 2 cardboard men, unfolded them and stood them at the rear of
my car facing oncoming traffic. They look so life like you wouldn't
believe it!

They are in trench coats exposing their nude bodies to the approaching
drivers.

To my surprise, cars start slowing down looking at my lifelike men which
made it safer for me to work at the side of the road. And of course,
traffic starts backing up. Everybody is tooting their horns and waving
like crazy. It wasn't long before a state trooper pulls up behind me.

He gets out of his car and starts walking towards me. I could tell he
was not a happy camper!

'What's going on here? '

'My car has a flat tire', I said calmly.

'Well, what are those obscene cardboard men doing here by the road? '

I couldn't believe that he didn't know. So I told him, 'Helloooo, those
are my emergency flashers! '

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♥ Laugh your heart out, dance in the rain. Cherish the memories, ignore the pain. Love and learn, forget and forgive. Because you only have one life to live. ♥