Karaoke Forums

1) What would you do in my situation? I feel disrepected and unappreciated. I work 60+ hours a week to help support her through school and she wants me to kill the goose that lays the golden egg. $35.00/hr. part time jobs are hard to come by! Plus, I really enjoy doing it (most nights).

2) Does your karaoke job affect your relationship/cause fights, etc, and how do you manage it?

First, I'm 33, married and do have kids and I do this line of work. My wife for the most part loves it. She loves that it gives her an opportunity to sing, loves partying with the friends we make at gigs, and we have a good time with it.

I'll answer your questions in the reverse order. It has affected our relationship, but mostly for the better. It gives us another thing that we do together, gets us out of the house for a few hours and provides another source of income meaning less arguing about finances. Granted there have been moments where it has caused some grief but overall it's been positive.

Regarding the first question, that is a question you have to answer for yourself. But here are some things to consider. How close are you guys, and what does she mean to you? If this is something you really love, what's going to happen if she forces you to live without it? Are you going to blame her and resent her for it (most likely yes)? Is it something you can give up for a while and then come back to (make sure that is the expectation before you give it up)?

The key here for you is going to be honesty. You have to tell her upfront what it means to you. If she gives you the "is it more important than me" speach, tell her no but that at the same time you just as it wouldn't be fair for someone to ask you to give her up, it's not fair of her to ask you to give it up and give you an ultimatum like that. Before you go into this conversation though you really have to know in your own mind, if it really does come down to chposing one or the other, which are you going to choose. There are many fish in the sea (depending on how close you two are) but it's pretty detrimental being forced to give up something you love.

Tell that to cops, paramedics, fire fighters, nurses, cabbies, and so on and so on and so on. Sorry she's full of you know what.

I learned a long time ago if someone makes you an ulitmatum like that, totell them not to let the door hit them on the way out.

In the words of Popeye "I yam whats I yam". You don't like it, too darn bad.

I'm 45 yrs old with a full time job and karaoke host 3 nights a week.

We do like Diafel's family. Sunday is our day to spend together. Does she want more time with you? Compromise by setting aside a special day or night just with her once a week.

If she is insecure about you being out without her that is a separate issue you need to address. The ultimatum part is a control move. If she doesn't trust you maybe she should leave.

You may want to question if you want to be with someone that doesn't support you in what you love. I don't like the fact my fiancee is a sports fanatic, but I'd never tell him he has to give it up because I know it is a part of who he is and how much he enjoys it. She is being controlling and selfish. This seems more like a relationship problem then a karaoke problem.

If my fiancee told me to pick one or the other. I'd tell him I'm not making the choice he can. I'm not quitting my business because that is part of who I am and if he can't except me for who I am he can make the choice to leave.

Good luck

I won't pretend to be a shrink in regard to your relationship. However, MY answer to her ultimatum:

Until you can pay 50% of the bills, it becomes MY responsibility in this relationship to make expenses, and I will do so to the best of my abilities FOR YOU. Karaoke makes up 20% of my available income to do so. Unless YOU can provide alternative income, then I must continue to host.

I try to put everything on a balance scale.......see which carries more weight than the other..........for example.......if she's an animal in the sack, then that can weigh more than 14- $50/hr. karaoke gigs per week.........just my opinion......can I get an Amen?....

In the words of Popeye "I yam whats I yam". You don't like it, too darn bad.

and what is that magical food that turns an animal in bed into a frigid disinterested NAG???? Oh yeah. That's right! It's called wedding cake.

and what is that magical food that turns an animal in bed into a frigid disinterested NAG???? Oh yeah. That's right! It's called wedding cake. If you're gonna let your <span style=font-size:10px><i>(@$%&#!)</i></span> make your decisions at this point, you deserve every bit of misery that is going to come your way.

Good Luck