From another post on one forum or another:
KARAOKE GLOSSARYWe've all seen these things happen at shows.
Well, someone actually sat down and named all these karaoke quirks. Enjoy!
Accompanist - Someone who always has to play an instrument (i.e. harmonica), bang on the table or clap along during one's song.
Aquaschmuch - Someone who goes to karaoke and only drinks water to avoid spending money...can be easily identified, as they are usually the biggest complainers about the rotation. ( Buy something, you cheap plicks!! {a "plick" is a small tipper in a Chinese restaurant- J.C.})
Arhythmia Idiotica - The one guy who always claps out of rhythm with the rest of the crowd, just to annoy others.
Audio Deficit - When the music fades out, but words are still left on the screen to sing.
Audio Repeatus - Hearing the same song twice in one night.
Audiophool - Someone who knows nothing about audio, but always tries to tell the KJ how to run the sound..."hey, can get some reverb, maaaaan?"
Auditory Delusion - When someone actually thinks that cupping their hand over their ear makes them sound better.
Bathroom Break (also known as "Smoke Break") A song, whenever performed, no matter how well performed, induces a customer or customers to head to the bathroom, outside, or anywhere else from the karaoke singing space.
Bohemia Nervosa - The irresistible urge to "bang" one's head in the instrumental break of Bohemian Rhapsody, usually with a stupid grin on their face, like they are the first ones to do this.
Boogie Compulsion - A disorder which compels otherwise conservative individuals to stampede blindly to the dance floor when someone sings "Play That Funky Music."
Cave Dweller - Someone who wraps their hand around the mic, thinking it looks cool, completely unaware that it makes their voice sound like they're singing "Aqualung."
Clappus Alonus - You are the only one clapping.
Clappus Falsalarmus - Accidentally clapping for the dance music. This is usually paired with the aforementioned Clappus Alonus, & usually quickly followed by Clappus Interuptus.
Clappus Interuptus - Clapping, then suddenly stopping when you realize the song isn't over.
Courtesy Clap - Applause that only happens because the audience is glad the song is over.
Dance Re-mix - A disc that always skips during a performance.
Dedication - Any ballad sung in the hopes of gaining female companionship for the evening.
Dorkapella - Someone who continues to sing even when the song is over, and refuses to stop until the KJ or the next singer grabs the mic from them.
Double Take - A singer who always misses the first part of the song, and the host has to start it over.
Draft Card - A request slip with someone's name on it who has not volunteered to sing.
Drive-By - Cruising past a show trying to estimate how big the rotation is without making the "commitment" of walking in.
Fake Virgin - A person performing on a karaoke stage for the first time in his or her life, but has sung in front of audiences before (i.e., was in a band, in choir, in opera, etc.).
Faux Boost - The act of complimenting a singer's not-so-good performance.
Fire Drill - Any song that causes large groups of people to head immediately for the nearest exit and line up outside.
Germicrophobia - The fear of "catching something" from the last singer by using the same microphone...resulting in the singer trying any of a dozen "sneaky" ways to wipe off the mic.
Ghost Singer - A person who puts in a song, promptly disappears until after they are called, then mysteriously re-appears.
Hit and Run - Someone who hangs around just long enough to sing, then vaporizes without a word.
Hog - A KJ who insists on singing in every rotation that has more than 15 singers.
Hollywood Kisses - Those annoying, plastic comments intended to gain favor from a host...(often recognizeable because of the repeated use of the word "really")...."We just love ya, babe...really...you're just the greatest host that ever lived...really...let's do lunch sometime...really!"
Hunting Season - The time where people who don't normally go to a certain karaoke show will go, IF THERE'S A CONTEST. Also called "karaoke whores."
Illusionist - A singer whose voice is in complete conflict with their looks... (example - she's dressed like Pasty Cline, and next thing you know she breaks out with Guns 'N Roses).
Irritagent - A non-singer who represents their "friend" to the host...and tries to get the KJ to move them up because they are "a so much better singer than all of these guys."
Karaboo - The discouraged practice of letting a singer know that despite what the host said, the singer actually stank to high hell.
Karachokie - When you try a song you've never done before, and blow it badly.
Kararchivist: Someone who brings recording equipment to shows, usually to record their own performances.
Karadultury - Someone who sings a duet with one person and leaves the bar with another.
Karaflare - The act of flicking cigarette lighters or matches in order to pay homage to a particular song.
Karaglyphics - Unreadable scribblings on a song slip. The language is usually "Drunkanese."
Karahokie - Those so called "standards" which are so far out that absolutely no one in their right (or wrong) mind ever does them. Example- "Gilligan's Island", "Flintstones", et al.
Karahoochie - Singer who thinks that they can get laid by acting like a slut while singing.
Karalloquial Dialect - The different ways to pronounce the word "Karaoke" based on what region a person is from.
Karamputee - Someone who's been cut out of the rotation for one reason or another.
Karamuck - The unidentifiable substance between the pages in a songbook that causes them to stick together. Also known as karaspooge.
Karandrogynous - Being able to sing male and female parts to a certain song.
Karaoke Alzheimer's - A singer turns in a song, then 5 minutes later has to come up and ask the host what they put in.
Karaoke Paranoia - A condition which makes a singer go up every 3 minutes to ask when they're up...resembles symptoms displayed by cocaine addicts.
Aren't you glad that you asked?
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